100 years ago women had very different issues than they do today. At that time, most women stayed home, raised their children, did housework and cooked dinner for their husband, rarely working outside of the home. If they did work outside of the home it was usually in a traditional female job, such as a housekeeper, teacher or nurse.
Today women not only take care of their homes and families, but they also may have very challenging careers of their own. Women today often run some of the largest companies as CEO and are some of our country’s greatest leaders.
Many times women strive to “have it all”, by maintaining a career, being active members of their community and being very involved in their children’s sports, school activities and supporting their husbands in their careers.
Prioritizing all of the tasks that they need to accomplish can be difficult and sometimes it is downright impossible to keep up. At times you may need to talk with someone who can help you to see things from a different point of view. Dr Pamela Rebeck knows what this is like and can help you rebalance your life.
Here are a few ideas to help avoid “burnout”:
- Get some help – household help, or children helping with chores, it will not hurt to have them help out, and will actually teach them how to fend for themselves.
- Take time for yourself – it may sound difficult, but is the best thing you can do. Meditation, exercise, a spa day, you cannot help anyone if you are exhausted.
- Take time with your spouse – have an honest talk about dividing the day to day tasks and take time to renew your relationship.
Try to keep a balance of your home life and work life and if at times it is hectic, know that this too shall pass and try not to stress too much!
Marriage and partner counseling can be of benefit whether you are preparing for marriage, are newly married or have been married for many years for the following reasons:
- Pre-marriage counseling can help to set the stage for marital success. Now is the time for communication about your expectations, agreements on financial issues and your ideas about children and family, whether you are planning your family or dealing with your children from previous relationships.
- Counseling in the early years of marriage is helpful when you step into reality of the day-to-day living and you find that you do have differences and you need to learn to compromise.
- After many years of marriage you may be in a routine and taking your spouse for granted without even realizing it. Counseling can help you to renew your commitment.
Regardless of where you are in your marital life – these tips are useful:
– Communication is key – don’t expect your partner to read your mind.
– Attitudes – don’t think the worst, criticize or judge. Notice the positives and show your appreciation.
– Be kind – treat your partner with the consideration you show to other people.
– Be responsible for your own behaviors – apologize when needed and forgive your partner.
Your heart’s desire can be achieved, it takes work, but anything worthwhile takes work and your marriage is certainly worthwhile.
Trichotillomania (hair pulling disorder) is a disorder that is not very well known, although approximately 1 in 100 people may have this disorder. While the exact cause is not identified, genetic factors may play a part in this condition, along with environmental factors and stress.
People who have trichotillomania have a compulsion to pull their hair out and it is difficult for others to understand why they “can’t just stop”. This condition often starts between the ages of 9-13 and may continue lifelong. Not only is it disfiguring, put there can be serious medical consequences. Due to feelings of shame, humiliation and anxiety associated with this condition, sometimes it is difficult for those who are affected to seek treatment. Some of the symptoms of trichotillomania include:
- Pulling hair from the scalp, eyebrows or other areas
- Biting, chewing or eating the pulled out hair
- Picking skin, biting nails or chewing lips may occur
Sometimes the hair is pulled out automatically or without the person being aware of this. Negative emotions may trigger the hair pulling or others may experience a positive feeling from the hair pulling. Fortunately, help is available with therapy that is tailored to the individual. Habit reversal training, or cognitive therapy, is very successful in treating this condition and psychotherapy/hypnotherapy treatments focused for children or adults can also be very beneficial.
When you are contemplating separation and divorce you need the guidance of a professional. Custody, visitation, fault, division of property, alimony and child support are all things that need to be considered. As much as you need an attorney for the legal issues, you also need to consult a professional for the emotional issues. Having someone that can guide you through an intensely emotional time and all of the changes that happen during that time is a necessity.
At times when there are children, there are goals that you and your spouse should
- Agree on matters related to the kids
- Be honest
- Don’t be critical of your spouse
- Be respectful
- Keep a routine
Children often go through a stressful, sad and confusing time when their parents separate or divorce. In order to minimize the difficulty for them, talk therapy is very helpful in expressing your feelings and emotions to someone who can provide solutions and coping skills in these situations. Talk herapy can be beneficial for all.